Hard Hitting Journalism takes on Shake Weight

A while back I mentioned this new fitness device sweeping the nation, which beyond just the obvious pervy connotations reminds me of the old vibrating belt exercise machines. It seems that beyond my natural pubescent desire to shake the demons out of me, society has been forever fixated on shaking the shit out of everything. Be it a machine shaking your midsection, or you shaking something that’s usually hanging just below the midsection, there’s a whole lot of shaking going on. Now I don’t need to be a genius to tell you, and probably many teenage boys can tell you too, this shake weight doesn’t do anything to get you closer to that million dollar body you’ve been hoping to get. ┬áLo and behold though, there will be idiots and for them this piece of hard hitting local news came out a few days ago to prove or disprove the benefits of worthless gimmicky fitness devices in a classic Fight Back manner. In the below rivetting piece of journalism we see Captain Obvious played by Rena Sarigianopoulos take us through the Shake Weight, Belly Burner, and other obviously crappy exercise gimmicky objects whilst her coworkers try to crank out 10 pushups. Not to hate on Rena, but come on there’s gotta be better things to do, or at least rate real exercise equipment. But at the end of the day if you still feel the need to shake something, try shaking a poodle, cause I mean who likes those horrid things anyway.

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